Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Strengths Discovery - Belief

Already onto number four for my top five strengths! Before I begin typing a post, I try to think through what I'd like to include or create a vague mental picture/outline of how I want to communicate my thoughts concerning that strength. My belief strength has been difficult for me to narrow down. Perhaps I'll reach better clarity once I'm in the thick of actually writing and recording it!
The author, Buckingham, states that a, "Belief theme causes you to be family-oriented, altruistic, even spiritual, and to value responsibility [my fifth strength] and high ethics - both in yourself and others." Through these venues a person with a strong belief system reaches the utmost satisfaction and meaning in life. Important characteristics include a sense of prioritization, a desire to be dependable and consistency between work/actions and values.

  • Faith in God/Christianity - Hands down, this has got to be the epidomy of my Belief system. I have never turned my back on my faith or strayed too far from a Christian life. There have been times, especially in my teenage and young adult years, that my perception concerning important Christian values has evolved. I'd like to think that the experiences in my personal relationship with God as well as my relationship with fellow brothers and sisters in Christ have shaped and molded me into the Christian I am today.
  • Family - I honestly don't know what kind of unthinkable person or situation would surround me at this moment were it not for the joy, support and encouragement I have received from my family. I am amazed at the gift I have received from God in my husband. To keep this post as brief as possible I will simply quote him in that I, "should never underestimate [his] awesomeness." My baby girl, Molly - indescribable. My parents, initially my caregivers, have become two of my dearest confidants and mentors as an adult. My sisters, now that we're spread out all over this grand continent, are three of my very best friends. There are inside jokes and stories between us that could never be replaced with any other people in the world! Dear friends who are like family... I could go on and on...
  • Music - I think of all the venues that music is used for people all around the world. It started in such a humble fashion for me as a child. One day I was learning how to say instrument names, years later I was performing the Stars and Stripes piccolo solo at Windsor Castle in London. My desire to be a music therapist and help others is overwhelming. Music can inspire someone to jump out of their seat to dance and move around. It can also create a calm ambiance at the end of a hectic day. Music can evoke emotions or help a person find clarity in a situation. How can I not use the gift of music God has provided me to help others in their struggles?
Some of my beliefs tend to conflict with each other. The biggest conflict, I think, is between my role as a future music therapist with that of my roles as a wife and mother. The reality of being a music therapist yields time and effort that I must take away from focusing solely on my family. This is a big deal to me primarily because the two are so important to my beliefs. I pray that in the future I will have the wisdom to discern which is more important in a situation-by-situation basis. I also pray for the courage to take the right course of action whenever these situations may occur.
My head is swimming with all of the other directions I could take with this post. I'll blame the end of this post on my growling stomach. It's lunchtime and Molly is taking a nap!

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Strengths Discovery - Adaptability

What is one of the first lessons one learns as a military wife? The plan will almost always change.
What is typically the second lesson learned after the first? You go with the flow. You adapt and overcome.
It is realization of the nature of my husband's job and its impact on my life that I believe have helped me these past 7 years as his wife. The third top strength of mine, adaptability, has played a crucial role with my reactions to last minute changes with his life. Countless times, especially with his schedule, we have anticipated months ahead of time for events to occur in a specific order and time frame; only to find out at the last minute that the plan has taken a different course and to expect anything to change as a result. Though it can definitely be a frustration (especially now having a child) I do not find it difficult to deal with these situations, however maddening they can become. More often than not, my desire to empathize with Mark's well being and how he is handling the situation arises before a personal impact. (It'sfun to see how my strengths play off of each other!)
I can remember, vividly, certain moments with other Navy wives when Mark was stationed on the submarine. There were a few in particular that struggled with the volatile nature of the boat schedule. It was rather pointless to depend on classified departure and arrival dates since they usually ended up becoming inaccurate. Tempers and emotions flying during family readiness group meetings, I sat there with a personal calm knowing in my mind that this was an aspect of Mark's job that was completely and utterly uncontrollable. I made it a point to never cut things too close to his schedule when making plans for travel or whatnot. Of all things, the only event that came really close to jeopardy was our wedding day! He came back 2-3 weeks past what he could only vaguely communicate would be his arrival date. (being only his fiancee I was not privy to the classified boat schedule yet) 7 years later we still have various last minute interruptions to deal with throughout the year. I try to be the best support I can be by tapping into what comes naturally. To adapt.
I'd like to think one of my shining moments as an adapter came in April of 2008. When I saw in the indicator of the pregnancy test, and knew that our lives had changed forever, my thoughts immediately went to all that I had originally intended for the months and years to come. Thankfully, helping hands from my family and friends are still key players in my determination to earn a music therapy degree. There are other plans that I've either abandoned or have put on hold for a while. And I know that God is in full control and would not give anything to me that I cannot handle! My future in addition to my family's future is most certainly not a "fixed destination." It gives me great joy to have the ability to be flexible to the curve balls that life may throw! I've come to "expect them."

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Strengths Discovery - Developer

Continuing on with my personal journey, this post will focus on my strength as a developer. In addition to its usefulness with my family and friends, I strongly believe that this is one of the key components concerning my desire to be and capability as a music therapist.

  • The role of a music therapist is very much a leadership opportunity. Just like any other therapy field, people come to you with some kind of individual need with the hopes that you will have the tools to help them in the most effective way possible. As a developer I am quickly drawn to seeing the "potential in others." (Buckingham & Clifton, 2001) What sets music therapy apart from other types of therapies is the use of music to help people reach some kind of non-musical goal. Therein lies a unique medium that clients may never have tried, throwing even more fuel onto to my internal developer fire! Through my clinical experiences I have discovered overwhelming joy when I observe clients discovering abilities and options that they previously never considered, or at least took seriously. I am encouraged by the encouragment they receive from me. One specific moment that comes to mind happened during one of my clinicals with children who had language delays. At our final session, during a self and peer recognition activity, a child previously unresponsive, recognized their name during the song, and lifted their hands right before pointing to themself! It was an incredible breakthrough for the child as well as the teacher and for my clinical partner and me. I was walking on air for the rest of the day!
  • I'd like to think that my strength as a developer is especially helpful in my relationships with those who are close to me. There have been a few times that Mark and I felt like we were hitting nothing but roadblocks in certain situations. What helped me during those times were to think of any possible solutions or alternatives for myself, for him, or for both of us together. Again, the joy that I experienced after working through those hard times is indescribable. As a developer I look back on those experiences and I realize the growth that he and I went through. Those situations helped us to become who we are today as a couple. Like the author of the book Now Discover Your Strengths so eloquently puts it, "No individual is fully formed." I like to picture our marriage as continually molding and shaping; never stuck or unchanging.
  • For the past two years I have managed the responsibility as band captain for the Charleston Southern University marching band. This position demanded an enormous amount of empathy as well as my strength as a developer. So many band members either came to me (or I found them) with problems or struggles they were experiencing. I could almost visualize their amazing potential if they were to just work on some kind of personal skill or to focus their efforts in a more encouraging direction. Through vocalizing my opinion (if they wanted it) or often praying for them I waited in anticipation for them to grow and develop past those troubles. It felt so fulfilling for me to watch the development in each of them!
Like before, I could keep on going with ideas that pertain to my strength as a developer. No blog post is ever completely finished and is a forever work in progress! I'm loving this strengths discovery!